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Personal behaviour

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Firebird
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Personal behaviour

Post by Firebird »

Gents,
Recently there a small disagreement between two of our patrons which they, I believe, have successfully resolved between them. This is good.

However, what has come to light is that more than one member here felt the need to pm one or other of the parties and say something which the receiver felt was unnecessary and over the top. This is not good.

Let me state quite clearly here, this is not acceptable. People occasionally have disagreements. Invariably these things get worked out when both sides take stock of the situation.
What neither side needs is an alliance forming to protect a particular viewpoint. These alliances normally result in a small local dispute being blown out of all proportion and the situation becomes very nasty and spills over and becomes uncontrollable.
For scholars of history, this is how World War I started.

Now on this forum we like everybody to have their own point of view and express them. We treat people like adults and expect to behave accordingly. We don't think that this is too much to ask of someone. If people can't treat others with respect then punitive action may be taken.

Please do not think that because the staff are not ranting and raving on this that we are not serious about this.


---===*===---

Now, leading on from this point. Whilst I am not happy that this situation came about what I am grateful for is that the abuse was not posted on the forums. This at least leads me to believe that the situation is manageable. All that we now need is that people think before they that post that pm.
You can always 'feedback' to individuals but remember that language is important. If the words you use are going to inflame somebody then your message gets lost and your post becomes irrelevant.

Again I stress that we treat people as adults. So I am not going to search for those involved. However, if anybody felt that the tone that they used in a pm was disproportionate I leave it to them to take any actions they may/may not seem appropriate.
Steve
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jetmax
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Re: Personal behaviour

Post by jetmax »

Steve
Very well said. If I may, I would like to add something about feedback. If I am off base or crossed over a line you do not think is appropriate, please delete this post and shoot me a message. I will understand

I am on the staff of a advanced leadership course for adult Boy Scout Leaders. One of the things we teach is effective feedback. Since main of us often seek feedback about our person creations here in the forum, I would like to offer up a few tips for the folks providing the feedback. Before providing feedback, ask yourself the following questions

Is it helpful?
Do others want it?
Can it change a behavior?
Is it specific?
Does it describe behavior?
How does it impact you?
Does it contain an “I” statement?
Did the recipient understand what you said?

Feedback is a gift.... however, we do not always give it (or receive it) in the proper way. Following the tips listed above can help this.

I hope this helps keep the flow of positive feedback going in the forums and remember, even negative feedback can be positive is presented in the right way.

Cheers

Scott
Scott "Jetmax" Jones
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Garysb
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Re: Personal behaviour

Post by Garysb »

Feedback
Brian and I have sorted it amicably I believe, I sure that Brian will concur

Gary
I believe that every human has a finite number of heart-beats. I don't intend to waste any of mine running around doing exercises.
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Sonarboy
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Re: Personal behaviour

Post by Sonarboy »

Yes I can concur with Gary re the amicable result. It was sorted very quickly via PM's

Brian
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Firebird
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Re: Personal behaviour

Post by Firebird »

This reinforces the point I was making. Not even any protagonists need people piling on, no matter how strongly they feel about an issue.
Steve
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